Congeniality was not in the job description.

Much of life is about making do with what you’ve got.

Whatever keeps one’s head unsplit.

As long as one avoids being the meal.

It’s always nice when the decorative becomes functional.

Or, failing that, perhaps some kind of fancy tarp.

Some investments are more volatile than others.

That’s one way to leave a bad review.

When it comes to matters of trade, nobody wants to get burned.

Nobody likes a slick mouse, after all.

As the jingle goes, “When your tum-tum needs some, have yourself a Quick Yum!”

Any reason’s a good reason for a little nigiri.

A broadly-applicable bit of life advice, perhaps.

Also, better ways to start a block party.